Unbelievable, but i just started playing poker again. I am going to give this a shot for a few weeks, if i manage to earn $100 by the end, I think I would consider playing poker.

I plan to put in 1000 hands a day at 0.10/0.25, playing only one table.

Worst-case scenario

Winrate = 1 BB/100 hands

Hands = 1000 * 30 days

Daily Profit = $0.25 * 10 = $2.50

Monthly Profit = $2.50 * 30 = $75

Medium-case

Winrate = 3 BB/100

Hands = 1000 * 30 days

Daily Profit = $0.75*10 = $7.50

Monthly Profit = $7.50 * 30 = $225

Best-case

Winrate = 10 BB/100

Hands = 1000 * 30 days

Daily Profit = $2.50*10 = $25.00

Monthly Profit = $25 * 30 = $750

If I can play 2-4 tables profitably, the numbers will go:

2-tabling = $150, $500, $1500

3-tabling = $225, $750, $2250

4-tabling = $300, $1000, $3000

3 BB/100 seems like a reasonable winrate to aim for. I would be so happy to win $225 for a start, if it could get to $1000 4-tabling per month, that would be even more awesome.

I just played some 0.05/0.10 on stars. This is the first time I’m playing online poker in 3 months (excluding occasional facebook poker which is nothing like fulltilt/stars). I ran pretty well at the start, getting paid off by calling stations. Bought-in for $6. Was at $16 at the peak point, but went down to $12-$13. Then to $8. Then to $1.60 (had tptk+nut flush vs set). I made some donkey calls today preflop, like calling $1.60 on a $5 pot preflop 3-way with 82s. Yes, I am an idiot. I should stop doing that. Especially not at 0.10/0.25.

I think the biggest barrier to not playing well is basically my mental state when i am playing. I often begin to drift away in my own thoughts after about an hour of playing and not pay attention to the action on the table. This is where i got to improve on. I have already started working out so i hope that will help with the concentration. Also some naturade won’t hurt, but i know it doesn’t last more than 1-2 hours. Other than that I plan to take quick breaks to freshen up my mind, possibly once every hour. We’ll see. This is my pokertableratings profile: ForMyTiaras.

I plan to think a lot about poker. Try not to focus on the money, but on putting the best attention when playing, and working hard thinking through the game a lot.

I seriously am thinking about beginning an exercise habit from now on. I am more and more convinced that our mental performance is tied to our physical fitness level. I was reading a pokernews article on durrrrr challenge and i came upon this conversation between durrrr and patrik.

durrrr: ok, i gtg soon 
durrrr: goin to gym in like 30min or so 
durrrr: mayb less 
Patrik Antonius: lets play 20min ok? 
durrrr: 30min or so is fine

What has this got to do with me planning to exercise? Well because i am a big fan of durrrr, and since he goes to the gym, i must think he finds exercise to be important. Also i must remind myself of something i read in the Bobby Fisher (chess legend) book where it was written that he trained his body like a Spartan (even though he was a chess player). This more than proves that exercise is crucial if we want to be able to perform mentally.

Also this made my day:

“durrrr” Challenge railbird quotes of the day: 

timmay28 (Observer): WHY HAVENT THE BLINDS GONE UP? 

PAC10Pride (Observer): durrrr, if you were a fruit, which would you be and why?

I just tilted playing poker just now. Not crazy throw money tilt, but half tilt. But more importantly, i have actually realised what causes me to tilt, so i can avoid it next time, or to leave when i am tilting.

I haven’t played poker for a week, not even a hand. And i have stopped playing poker because i am learning about stock trading. But just now, what started as a message on facebook with a friend, turned into a facebook poker session. I know most of you would be like no way… you’re complaining about tilting on facebook poker?! But yes i am. Because tilting happen anywhere, at any game, no matter high low or even play money.

I sat on a 20000/40000 table with 800000 chips, which is 20 big blinds, but trust me, 20 big blinds is above average stack on the table because almost everyone on facebook poker buy-in the minimum of 10 big blinds. I won a 4 way all in. I had ATo. Two people went all-in before me. On full tilt poker, i would fold this for sure, ATo is almost never good, because their shoving range would be like AQ+ 88+ at least. And ATo is definitely way behind. But since this is facebook poker… where it’s normal to see 4 people go all-in preflop, you gotta know their mad shoving range, which is usually A4+ K9+ They are not so good as to shove low pocket pairs, but i see all sorts of Kings and Aces being shoved. So my ATo is actually pretty good here. The first shover is nuts, and later on he actually open shoved J7o, so i know i was good here. The 2nd to act is a bit tighter, but still loose, i think a lot of the time she could have K9 KT KJ KQ Low Ace type of hand, which i am ahead of, so i call. But i get like 2 callers behind too. Shover held some junk hand, 2nd to act held A8o, I had ATo, other guy had K9 i think.

But the point of this post is to discuss my tilt. Soon i manage to double up because i had TT and flop a set. I had 1,800,000 on the table now. I banked the 1m in profits, and bought in 800,000 again. Too much money = ego = play loose = lose money. So i banked, and started with 800,000 again. Now from here onwards people on the table didn’t change and they tightened up a bit. They know my tight style and probably tightened up a bit themselves. I didn’t get any hand at all the whole hour i think, and with no action, i got bored and started getting distracted and uninterested in the game. This is when i half-tilted. I define tilt a bit differently – when not at the best state of mind to play at the level i am capable of.

Then came the deciding hand. I was dealt AJo at UTG+1. UTG open shoved. I think he might be full of it. As i said A4+ K9+. But then again, i had a feeling his hand is strong this time. But i still called, i can’t lay down AJo, it’s the best hand i had in an hour! One more guy called. 3 way into flop. Flop came low cards, no Ace no jack. Guy who called last won with QQ. I would say i tilted a bit here, and called with AJo. But i really wanted to see the UTG’s card. If he had like A8s ATo then i made a good call, but if he only shoves like that with AQ AK or TT+ i probably have made a terrible call. Either way i was on tilt, and i make these rationalised unrational decisions, i call them. Which are decisions i wouldn’t have made if i was calm and attentive, but when i am half-tilted, i would rationalise a call just to get action because i am impatient and on tilt.

Yes, i think my guilt is boredom, and lack of purpose in life. It would sound very exaggerating but it is. Boredom, as lack of motivation is caused by not doing what you is right for you based on your values. If you know what is right, and you still ignore and presist on the old path, you will be dissatisfied. I guess playing poker is not what i wanted to be doing just now. I could have done so many more things which would be more meaningful for me, like chatting with friends, catching up on news. Instead i slogged on playing poker, even when i stopped enjoying it after half an hour. It is funny i always enjoy the first hour of playing poker, and win much, and after that when my broedom kicks in i lose a lot back. So when i am faced with this situation next time, i would stop playing poker, and do something else. If i can play only 30minutes of enjoyable poker, i will only play 30 minutes. Life is more than one thing, one hobbby, or one person, one achievement, you gotta do things that are meaningful to you.

okay you can smell a long philosophical post coming, and so can i :)

I been reading Eckhart Tolle’s “A New Earth” lately. And i have been thinking about concepts he has talked about like the “pain-body” and “ego” and “self” and i think it’s good that i read this book because i think i have whatever you call “an ego” or a certain selfishness.

Basically i find that i really hate it when “people don’t act in my self interest”. Which means people don’t do things the way i want them to. Of course when things turn out not the way it should, or the way i want/expect them to will also cause me to feel angry. This i believe is the same for everybody. Who can say they don’t feel sad after a failure? But Eckhart has taught the need for “Acceptance”. Which means even though you failed, or things didn’t turn out the way you want them to, you should “accept” instead of “reject” and not “be stucked in the past” because “the power is always in the present”. Accept the person who has mistaken you for something you didn’t do, do not “reject” or scold or seperate yourself from that person. Everyone goes through the same problems, but it’s better to “accept” rather than “react in self defence”.

So i find that when i get bad beated in Poker. For example, last night i flopped the nut straight and got sucked out on. Obviously i made the right play, but things didn’t turn out the way it “correctly” should. I feel like my “self” has been wronged. Like someone blaming you furiously for something you didn’t do, you feel like you are at the receiving end of negativity that you don’t deserve. I think that i sum it up pretty well there. When something terrible happens to you that you don’t deserve, your reaction is to dump this negativity some place else. And containing it will be insane, because rationally, we don’t deserve this negativity! And more often than not, the person who wronged you is the one you will throw this negativity back towards.

I still don’t know how to deal with these forced to receive negativity moments. In poker and in life, it’s just tough to deal with. Of course it’s easy to say accept and forgive. But it’s harder than you think. It’s like physically taking a punch in a the face, it’s very hard to ignore. And anger makes us “separated” from the whole. I learnt about separation from Eckhart and i find it a great concept. I am becoming aware that when i am angry or uncomfortable i feel “Separated” from the world, from everything, it’s all about me and what i’m unhappy about. On the other hand, being at peace and accepting of bad situations still keeps us “At One” with the source, and therefore will bring us more good. Also we shouldn’t keep alone. If you are alone for a few hours, i find you will experience this certain feeling of unease which probably is caused by “separation from the whole”. Therefore a person needs to go out and be around people and interact with people to stay “connected” to the whole. Only then will you receive more blessings.

I am beginning to understand better, and realise the deeper meaning of things wise men have said. And i remember Rockefeller in his letter to his son emphasize how eating well and rest is a religious duty. I now believe that without eating on time and resting well, i cannot advance in my pursuits, it’s really a spiritual duty to take care of our health. Thinking is not everything.

Okay my goal is to get ranked in the low orbit or Mercury Division ($1-$2.99 SNGs). Basically you just need to complete 20 games. And your total points will be determined by your rank in the SNGs. In the 9 man SNGs which most people play, you get 45 points for 1st, 27 for 2nd, 18 for 3rd. Much like the payout which is $4.50, $2.70 and $1.80. So all i have to do to find out my profits is to divide the points by 10. So if i got 300 points after 20 games. I actually earned $30 in 20 games.

As of writing this blog, i’m playing my 20th SNG to complete the low orbit total points. Blinds are at 25/50 now, so it might take another 30 minutes probably. I only start playing seriously and opening more hands at 50/100 level. I’m at 261 points after 19 games. which is really bad!! Considering i had 189 points already on the 6th game! So my last 13 games couldn’t even match half my points for the first 6 games! How bad is that :( but it’s probably also because i was running too well the first 6 games. I was 6tabling and was in ITM for all 6 tables, finishing 1st 1st 1st 3rd 3rd 3rd! really i never did 6 tabling and get results like this before it’s crazy. It was just blinkin everywhere and i couldn’t concentrate playing HU and 3handed on 4/5 tables.

Really dissapointed in my play too. i could have layed certain hands down that i knew i would be beat by, but because my stack has been reduced so much i just couldn’t stand not calling and having to contend myself with not knowing his/her hand while i remain as shortstack. So i called each time and yeah, that person called down with mid pair and hit his flush, or called down with flush draw and hit the flush on the river. I still payed them off even though i know im beat, next time i should just fold and be content that i made a good fold.

So it’s very likely this last SNG i’m playing i don’t get ITM. So my final points will 261 after 20 games. So that means i earned $26.10 after 20 games. And since each game costs $1+0.20.  $1.20 x 20 = $24. So my profit after 20 games = $26.10 – $24 = $2.10! How pathetic lol. Well at least i’m still up. With the rate i’m going the last 15 games i should be happy i’m still up. It seems i only cashed 3 out of the last 13 games. and they are not first places.. two 3rds one 2nd. Also i folded JJ otb once just now when blinds are high, wasn’t paying attention..

I think i do well at the start. Always, when i play any game or sport, i do well in the first 15min or so, when i’m excited and feel happy playing, then i start to lose focus and enthusiasm and do badly. As of writing this i just shoved 33 on the bb with 2 limpers behind. Internet sucks right now, i get disconnected, and when i come back i already won the pot. I check the history and it’s not what i expected. I thought i would have won it against say like a KJ who decided to call the shove after limping, or AJ, AT type of hand which i’m 50-50 against. Turns out i got called by 2 people, holding KK(shortstack) and TT, and i spiked a 3 on the flop. ouch. but i just knocked out of that SNG, i forgot what happened. I am not even observing the table. I think thats my bad habit, i just don’t concentrate on the game. I get restless and must do something else.

My Pokerstars lagging so bad the last 30minutes! I had no lag problems, but just the last 30minutes i get these lags and disconnects, it’s so annoying!

okay back from playing my last 2 tables. knocked out of one when i shoved A8 into 3 people, and get called by AK. The other one i was up against this guy who i was chatting with earlier about a hand i was involved with him in. So it was good we were HU. he played quite tight and it’s easy to play against him. He does some donkey shoves sometimes though, i called him right with A3, he had K5. And he flopped trip fives. Then later he stopped shoving, then all of a sudden shoved again, i knew i was behind with A2s but i had to call, then saw he had A3o ugh! I flopped deuce though and won it. Last hand he tried to bluff me with Q high i called with King pair, there was ace on the board.

I’m not at my best mindset right now. Played too much, and was too unfocused when i play. Listening to music, watching videos, and blogging while i play. Next time i’ma try better to not get too complacent after winning a few games and continue grinding with good attitude. Consistency, that’s all i’m asking for!

I finished the 20 games with 261 points :/ Although i won one game, it was the 23rd game. I actually over shot and played 3 extra games. It’s difficult to keep track of how many games you played when they only record ur results after the table finished playing. So if you got knocked out in 7th in your 5th game let’s say. Your record will show 4 games only. And after 30minutes or so, and your table completes playing, then the table updates. It’s pretty confusing :/ It’s alright that i exceed because i need to play 100 games to get into high orbit rankings anyway.

So it’s 15:00 Monday in America. So the rankings for this week has only gone on for 15 hours. And no one plays from midnight to morning.. so only 44 people have actually completed the low orbit 20 games. So we get to see how much everyones completed scored so far. Top score is 489, this guy is also the only person who’s finished the high orbit! So he’s played 100 games in this 15 hours! So crazy. Is that even possible.. So he plays prolly 10 tables an hour, and played 10 hours straight. Quite sick. Anyway i’m ranked 19th out of 53 people ranked so far. Slightly above average. Pretty bad imo, i was aiming for 420+ which would be what is need to get ranked in top 100 by the end of the week.

But more importantly (or not importantly) check this out.

The bottom 3 players… only have 2 digit points. So they earned $9.20, $6.10 and $1.60 (OMG) respectively after spending $24.00. How the hell someone can only get 16 points after 20 games just blow my mind. He played an 18man SNG and got 4th. Wow it’s just pretty shocking. And only the top 27 people actually got more than 240 points ($24), which means only half of the people so far are in the profit, the rest are losing money. That’s actually revealing. But wouldn’t a losing player not have the motivation to play 20 games in 10 hours?? I’m actually at 10% roi, but for $1 sng i should be doing 20% at least! Even 30% is not much to ask for.

Aiming to finish 100 games, i don’t really care what my score is, i just hope i am up, which i should be. I just want to get the 100 games in in the next 6 days. I just aim for volume now, not monetary goals. If i play more i think i will get better, and if i win i won’t feel like i should stop playing.

It’s good if you 3-outer someone (good for you, not for EV), but it’s even better to get lucky on the last hand of the tournament.

PokerStars Game #28530231557: Tournament #166047954, $1.00+$0.20 Hold’em No Limit – Level VI (100/200) – 2009/05/23 13:15:23 ET

Table ‘166047954 1′ 9-max Seat #8 is the button

Seat 6: ForMyTiaras (9080 in chips) 

Seat 8: DrumX (4420 in chips) 

DrumX: posts small blind 100

ForMyTiaras: posts big blind 200

*** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to ForMyTiaras [9c Ac]

DrumX: calls 100

ForMyTiaras: raises 400 to 600

DrumX: calls 400

*** FLOP *** [8c 5s Ad]

ForMyTiaras: bets 800

DrumX: raises 800 to 1600

ForMyTiaras: calls 800

*** TURN *** [8c 5s Ad] [7d]

ForMyTiaras: checks 

DrumX: bets 2220 and is all-in

ForMyTiaras: calls 2220

*** RIVER *** [8c 5s Ad 7d] [6h]

*** SHOW DOWN ***

ForMyTiaras: shows [9c Ac] (a straight, Five to Nine)

DrumX: shows [Th As] (a pair of Aces)

ForMyTiaras collected 8840 from pot

*** SUMMARY ***

Total pot 8840 | Rake 0 

Board [8c 5s Ad 7d 6h]

Seat 6: ForMyTiaras (big blind) showed [9c Ac] and won (8840) with a straight, Five to Nine

Seat 8: DrumX (button) (small blind) showed [Th As] and lost with a pair of Aces

Ughh so bad.. shud’ve folded

PokerStars Game #28527800699: Tournament #166039685, $1.00+$0.10 Hold’em No Limit – Level III (25/50) – 2009/05/23 11:52:28 ET

Table ‘166039685 5′ 9-max Seat #7 is the button

Seat 1: bentv2 (3130 in chips) 

Seat 2: Es Dimoni (1145 in chips) 

Seat 3: mocro_wins (1310 in chips) 

Seat 4: salmon12345 (1810 in chips) 

Seat 5: 27UTG (3380 in chips) 

Seat 6: RobE88 (1535 in chips) 

Seat 7: paddy253 (2685 in chips) 

Seat 8: ForMyTiaras (1655 in chips) 

Seat 9: grincolos (1430 in chips) 

ForMyTiaras: posts small blind 25

grincolos: posts big blind 50

*** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to ForMyTiaras [Kd Kc]

bentv2: calls 50

Es Dimoni: calls 50

mocro_wins: calls 50

salmon12345: folds 

27UTG: folds 

RobE88: raises 150 to 200

paddy253: folds 

ForMyTiaras: raises 300 to 500

grincolos: folds 

bentv2: folds 

Es Dimoni: folds 

mocro_wins: folds 

RobE88: calls 300

*** FLOP *** [Ac 7c 2c]

ForMyTiaras: checks 

RobE88: bets 1035 and is all-in

ForMyTiaras: calls 1035

*** TURN *** [Ac 7c 2c] [Ah]

*** RIVER *** [Ac 7c 2c Ah] [9h]

*** SHOW DOWN ***

ForMyTiaras: shows [Kd Kc] (two pair, Aces and Kings)

RobE88: shows [Jd As] (three of a kind, Aces)

RobE88 collected 3270 from pot

*** SUMMARY ***

Total pot 3270 | Rake 0 

Board [Ac 7c 2c Ah 9h]

Seat 1: bentv2 folded before Flop

Seat 2: Es Dimoni folded before Flop

Seat 3: mocro_wins folded before Flop

Seat 4: salmon12345 folded before Flop (didn’t bet)

Seat 5: 27UTG folded before Flop (didn’t bet)

Seat 6: RobE88 showed [Jd As] and won (3270) with three of a kind, Aces

Seat 7: paddy253 (button) folded before Flop (didn’t bet)

Seat 8: ForMyTiaras (small blind) showed [Kd Kc] and lost with two pair, Aces and Kings

Seat 9: grincolos (big blind) folded before Flop

Typical cooler

PokerStars Game #28529214387: Tournament #166047675, $1.00+$0.20 Hold’em No Limit – Level III (25/50) – 2009/05/23 12:40:43 ET

Table ‘166047675 1′ 9-max Seat #4 is the button

Seat 1: Löpelmann (1520 in chips) 

Seat 2: ForMyTiaras (1470 in chips) 

Seat 3: 200nando26 (1940 in chips) 

Seat 4: jmm92 (1315 in chips) 

Seat 5: mottupoker (2915 in chips) 

Seat 6: moegruder (1430 in chips) 

Seat 9: Royasse (2910 in chips) 

mottupoker: posts small blind 25

moegruder: posts big blind 50

*** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to ForMyTiaras [Kh Kd]

Royasse: folds 

Löpelmann: calls 50

ForMyTiaras: raises 100 to 150

200nando26: raises 100 to 250

jmm92: folds 

mottupoker: folds 

moegruder: folds 

Löpelmann: folds 

ForMyTiaras: raises 300 to 550

200nando26: raises 300 to 850

ForMyTiaras: calls 300

*** FLOP *** [7s Th 7d]

ForMyTiaras: bets 620 and is all-in

200nando26: calls 620

*** TURN *** [7s Th 7d] [8s]

*** RIVER *** [7s Th 7d 8s] [4d]

*** SHOW DOWN ***

ForMyTiaras: shows [Kh Kd] (two pair, Kings and Sevens)

200nando26: shows [Ac As] (two pair, Aces and Sevens)

200nando26 collected 3065 from pot

*** SUMMARY ***

Total pot 3065 | Rake 0 

Board [7s Th 7d 8s 4d]

Seat 1: Löpelmann folded before Flop

Seat 2: ForMyTiaras showed [Kh Kd] and lost with two pair, Kings and Sevens

Seat 3: 200nando26 showed [Ac As] and won (3065) with two pair, Aces and Sevens

Seat 4: jmm92 (button) folded before Flop (didn’t bet)

Seat 5: mottupoker (small blind) folded before Flop

Seat 6: moegruder (big blind) folded before Flop

Seat 9: Royasse folded before Flop (didn’t bet)

Almost another cooler if i didn’t hit my set

PokerStars Game #28529338977: Tournament #166048129, $1.00+$0.20 Hold’em No Limit – Level III (25/50) – 2009/05/23 12:44:57 ET

Table ‘166048129 1′ 9-max Seat #5 is the button

Seat 1: jonezki (2500 in chips) 

Seat 4: Spaceworkers (2110 in chips) 

Seat 5: BrokeNBliss (1030 in chips) 

Seat 7: ForMyTiaras (2020 in chips) 

Seat 8: DmHvac (4185 in chips) 

Seat 9: Malleus09 (1655 in chips) 

ForMyTiaras: posts small blind 25

DmHvac: posts big blind 50

*** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to ForMyTiaras [Qs Qd]

Malleus09: raises 200 to 250

jonezki: folds 

Spaceworkers: folds 

BrokeNBliss: folds 

ForMyTiaras: calls 225

DmHvac: folds 

*** FLOP *** [8d Ts Qc]

ForMyTiaras: checks 

Malleus09: checks 

*** TURN *** [8d Ts Qc] [7c]

ForMyTiaras: bets 250

Malleus09: calls 250

*** RIVER *** [8d Ts Qc 7c] [2c]

ForMyTiaras: bets 650

Malleus09: calls 650

*** SHOW DOWN ***

ForMyTiaras: shows [Qs Qd] (three of a kind, Queens)

Malleus09: mucks hand 

ForMyTiaras collected 2350 from pot

*** SUMMARY ***

Total pot 2350 | Rake 0 

Board [8d Ts Qc 7c 2c]

Seat 1: jonezki folded before Flop (didn’t bet)

Seat 4: Spaceworkers folded before Flop (didn’t bet)

Seat 5: BrokeNBliss (button) folded before Flop (didn’t bet)

Seat 7: ForMyTiaras (small blind) showed [Qs Qd] and won (2350) with three of a kind, Queens

Seat 8: DmHvac (big blind) folded before Flop

Seat 9: Malleus09 mucked [Kc Kd]

Yes i know it’s only $1 !! but first time ever winning a 45man, i only play 9 man sngs, so kinda excited. wasn’t expecting it this being just for fun and last game of the night.

wasn’t expecting it cos i always do bad at 90mans, but i guess 45 is not that big of a field. was a short stack coming into the final table. then barely made it into the money thanks to 2 big stacks eaten by one bigger stacked. Then i won a coinflip, 55 vs AJo. Then called in the big blind with aces, no brainer. And got to 2nd! I can’t believe it considering i was down to 2BB at one point lol. HU was pretty quick and sick.

1st hand – bluff into a straight, how great is my hand reading skillz

PokerStars Game #28494232189: Tournament #165798544, $1.00+$0.10 Hold’em No Limit – Level XII (800/1600) – 2009/05/22 14:06:15 ET

Table ‘165798544 5′ 9-max Seat #4 is the button

Seat 4: ForMyTiaras (24826 in chips) 

Seat 9: JENITA 222 (42674 in chips) 

ForMyTiaras: posts the ante 75

JENITA 222: posts the ante 75

ForMyTiaras: posts small blind 800

JENITA 222: posts big blind 1600

*** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to ForMyTiaras [2s 6d]

ForMyTiaras: calls 800

JENITA 222: checks 

*** FLOP *** [Ks 3c Qc]

JENITA 222: checks 

ForMyTiaras: bets 1600

JENITA 222: calls 1600

*** TURN *** [Ks 3c Qc] [Ac]

JENITA 222: checks 

ForMyTiaras: checks 

*** RIVER *** [Ks 3c Qc Ac] [Kc]

JENITA 222: checks 

ForMyTiaras: bets 3200

JENITA 222: calls 3200

*** SHOW DOWN ***

ForMyTiaras: shows [2s 6d] (a pair of Kings)

JENITA 222: shows [Js Td] (a straight, Ten to Ace)

JENITA 222 collected 12950 from pot

*** SUMMARY ***

Total pot 12950 | Rake 0 

Board [Ks 3c Qc Ac Kc]

Seat 4: ForMyTiaras (button) (small blind) showed [2s 6d] and lost with a pair of Kings

Seat 9: JENITA 222 (big blind) showed [Js Td] and won (12950) with a straight, Ten to Ace

2nd hand – shoved over by K9s, i call with Jacks

PokerStars Game #28494253992: Tournament #165798544, $1.00+$0.10 Hold’em No Limit – Level XII (800/1600) – 2009/05/22 14:06:52 ET

Table ‘165798544 5′ 9-max Seat #4 is the button

Seat 4: ForMyTiaras (19226 in chips) 

Seat 9: JENITA 222 (48274 in chips) 

ForMyTiaras: posts the ante 75

JENITA 222: posts the ante 75

ForMyTiaras: posts small blind 800

JENITA 222: posts big blind 1600

*** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to ForMyTiaras [Jc Jd]

ForMyTiaras: raises 1600 to 3200

JENITA 222: raises 44999 to 48199 and is all-in

ForMyTiaras: calls 15951 and is all-in

Uncalled bet (29048) returned to JENITA 222

*** FLOP *** [7h Tc Qs]

*** TURN *** [7h Tc Qs] [9c]

*** RIVER *** [7h Tc Qs 9c] [7s]

*** SHOW DOWN ***

JENITA 222: shows [9h Kh] (two pair, Nines and Sevens)

ForMyTiaras: shows [Jc Jd] (two pair, Jacks and Sevens)

ForMyTiaras collected 38452 from pot

*** SUMMARY ***

Total pot 38452 | Rake 0 

Board [7h Tc Qs 9c 7s]

Seat 4: ForMyTiaras (button) (small blind) showed [Jc Jd] and won (38452) with two pair, Jacks and Sevens

Seat 9: JENITA 222 (big blind) showed [9h Kh] and lost with two pair, Nines and Sevens

Next hand – i pick up jacks again.. he open shoved, easy call.

PokerStars Game #28494270039: Tournament #165798544, $1.00+$0.10 Hold’em No Limit – Level XIII (1000/2000) – 2009/05/22 14:07:19 ET

Table ‘165798544 5′ 9-max Seat #9 is the button

Seat 4: ForMyTiaras (38452 in chips) 

Seat 9: JENITA 222 (29048 in chips) 

ForMyTiaras: posts the ante 100

JENITA 222: posts the ante 100

JENITA 222: posts small blind 1000

ForMyTiaras: posts big blind 2000

*** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to ForMyTiaras [Jh Js]

JENITA 222: raises 26948 to 28948 and is all-in

ForMyTiaras: calls 26948

*** FLOP *** [3d Ks Ac]

*** TURN *** [3d Ks Ac] [6s]

*** RIVER *** [3d Ks Ac 6s] [Jc]

*** SHOW DOWN ***

ForMyTiaras: shows [Jh Js] (three of a kind, Jacks)

JENITA 222: shows [Ts Kd] (a pair of Kings)

ForMyTiaras collected 58096 from pot

*** SUMMARY ***

Total pot 58096 | Rake 0 

Board [3d Ks Ac 6s Jc]

Seat 4: ForMyTiaras (big blind) showed [Jh Js] and won (58096) with three of a kind, Jacks

Seat 9: JENITA 222 (button) (small blind) showed [Ts Kd] and lost with a pair of Kings

In summary:

- shove in the sb with 25s, got called by KT and flopped a full house 2s full of fives.. yay! (i was left with 2bb so no choice but to shove)

-won a coinflip 55 vs AJ, pick up aces when blinds are very high = gold, pick up 2 jacks in a row against HU shove-r = yay!

-AIPF his KT vs my JJ. flop came King, turn blank, and river Jack = justice

- 45man SNG and 27man 18man are probably worth a try! (variance may not be as bad as i think, and reward is much bigger)

So far my live losses is like $300, i just calculated that this morning. And online i’m break even (if not for losing $80 in my first hour playing 1/2 or 0.5/1 i can’t remember).

I have half quit poker a few times already but i think i love the game too much to quit. I love poker like i love Warcraft 3 (melee not dota!) and Virtua Striker. I love the game and the ability to improve your game if you take time and effort to hink it through, and the whole records and rankings systems to track your progress.

My plan is to focus on trading for a source of income and play poker at the side. I have become really realistic these days because i tried for a few weeks and the swings just tell me i am not yet cut out to play poker for a living. Even if i do become one of the best players lets say, i would be earning like $100,000 a year. That would be huge now. But think of when i’m 40, and i’m earning $100,000 a year still, that won’t be awesome. So i think i must find myself a more stable source of income, and play poker on the side, and try to do the best i can at it.

I think it would be great this way because i can appreciate poker more if i play it a little everyday ratehr than playing it all day everyday. When you put in so much hours into something it’s not easy to keep things fresh. But maybe it’s because i don’t have that massing ability. I have always been the type to observe pros play a game, and try to model them. I watch too much, play too little. While i see the best gamers and poker players are those that play way too much! So i’m trying to improve on this aspect, i plan to clock in a set amount of games every night instead of just playing when i feel like it.

2 posts before this i was complaining about running bad at the $2.25 sngs on tilt. That was my first time out trying $2.25 and i remember i was having the same variance problem at $1.25 at some time. It’s just variance! I manage to run okay on $2.25 after that, and then run so bad again like 7 straight games of no cash, and finally when i cash i get 3rd. Was dejected to say the least. You definitely can’t tell that volume solves variance then cos when you lose 2 games, then another 2 games, then another 2 games, and then finally cash out for 3rd only, you just feel like sh*t.

Luckily i found something called super turbos hahaha. I started with normal sngs on stars, then i found turbos on tilt, at first i didn’t know the difference. But later i loved the turbos because the beginning stages i fold almost every hand which is boring, the action really is at 50/100, when you are at about 1300 if you have folded every hand so far. So 13BB to 20BB for everyone, that’s when it gets interesting. So one fateful day i observed a super turbo game $100 buyin i think, the biggest running super turbo on tilt. and i didn’t know what the hell super turbos were until saw the starting chip stack of 300 and blinds at 15/30. That’s starting with 10BB and the blinds go up as quick as turbos. I tried it, the cheapest one at $3.80 after having the bad run at $2.25 and run so crazyily good and bad beating people in and out and won it for $15.75! A huge thing when your bankroll is $70. I was excited about it but i didn’t play anymore cos i thought i could only win because i lucked out.

Then i found that one of my friend S is playing so much of $3.80 45mans and he manage to cash in 2nd and 1st! And 1st is for $60 and 2nd $40. wow i thought. So i observed one of these crazy super turbo all in fest 45mans. Being the careful person i must first assess what the game is like and how to play it. I found through watching that shoving low aces on the CO and BTN is no good. people seem to get called out in the blinds by a higher ace like AQ. so it’s better to wait out for a premium hand even with like 2-3BB left.

So i played the 45man $3.80 and guess what cashed in 2nd! For $40! The first time i played it. I was pretty excited. My bankroll ballooned. And i played another 5 of those i think. Bubble out 7th in one, just missing out on cash (top 6 cashes), 2 of them was ranked 17 20, and the other 2 were so bad 33 42 something like that. Anyway i loved the super turbos ever since. I thought it was the no nonsense straight to high blind sng play. Except starting with 9 players not 4 or 5. I ran like crazy one night, profit $60 after 10 9man super turbos. That’s like 200% roi for the day! But the next day i played 2 times the amount – 20 games – and managed only to break even. How sucky is that… then i know not to get to complacent, and that running good is a huge part of my earlier wins. I continue to play the turbos and super turbos and run not so well, down a bit everyday, pretty frustrating. Then i decide to play one table at once, i was really sucking at 4 tabling the turbos. And 1 tabling did me wonders, i was aware of everything happening at the table and know my opponent’s ranges and tendencies. I manage to cash like almost everytime i single table. So my bankroll was up again. Then recently i played 3 super turbos 9man and cashed 1 3 2. always good to run good (or was i playing good?).

Recently i played on stars for fun and built my roll up from $25 because S wanted to borrow some from me, about $10. I built it up to $40 running good in SNGs. manage to get 3rd playing a 18man. i rarely play and rarely cash at these 11+ players sngs. I then find out about the stars sng leaderbaords and took a shot. I was doing really good for my first 4 games, and decide to 4 table it 4 times to complete 20 games and trying to get into low orbit rankings. And oh my goodness. ran so bad at $1 it’s crazy. my 4 tabling was so robotic i had no reads on any players and i just didn’t feel good playing it. And the results. i ran like 456457457865. Not liek that but close. I was down like $6 after 16 $1 sngs. which is like -30% roi on $1 sngs! which i should be crushing. I don’t know what went wrong, and what was wrong. i looked back and saw some bad beats, some bad calls. Don’t know but i was sure 4-tabling cause me to play inflexible and i had no reads on people. i decide to one table or 2 table now and doing better. Aiming for low orbit rank. i need about 420 to get ranked in the top 100. Which is like 21 per game. So i need to get 2nd/3rd every game or get like 1st for every 2 games.

I am playing as i am writing this blog and didn’t turn out good. I try to 3x people in the sb too much during high blind play. about 11BB. i 3xed the big blind, he shoves on me (he’s chip leader and has like 30BB, covers me by a lot). I am fed up and think he might have nothing because he did that like 1 orbit before. I thought he was abusing me being midstacked. I knew i should fold having like 7 BB left but i just called out of curiousity and he had a better hand than i thought. He had A5s. Flop didn’t help me and i was out in 5th. I thought his range is from total air (if my theory of him abusing as CL was right) or something like rag kings aces or even QT JT J9 type of hands. Anyway i was out because i couldn’t fold, bad habit. earlier on i limped on button with JKo. and now i know why not to limp JKo with 30bb. flop came 34J. 4 players including me. first 2 check, 2nd last to act, min bets, i 3x-ed, pretty standard. sb folds. bb raise all-in. now i know i probably beat. But by what?! J4? J3? those were the hands i was thinking of. I mean he’s in the big blind he can have anything. 34 was possible too. And a set… ah… that’s possible to. Thinking he check raised, a set is most probable, people would tend to lead out to protect two pairs. i called and he revealed 44. I knew i was beat but i just couldn’t lay it down, i just hoped he was a donk who did that with J8 J9 JT JQ, but it was not to be… i should have folded. I had like 20BB left i think, maybe even more.

enough rambling. it’s just past midnight here, i’m going to play some more games on stars, staying true to the plan of massing games. will keep blogging, and updating. My plan is to get ranked in low orbit Mercury division, and then to get $150 on stars and move up to $3.40 SNGs. It’s all about stars now, although i really miss full tilt turbos! non-turbos as so slow i can’t stand it! but now i’m getting used to it. Will build my roll on stars like i did on tilt, slowly and steadly hopefully, and i really hope i think through the game more and improve my SNG play.

Ok I’m back to blogging now after leaving this blog for like half a year? I am posting again because yes, i’m play poker. I guess i don’t quit that easily… I want to do other things but i don’t know, i guess my mind is poker-filled already. HELP. I am not a gambling addict, i just crave action! I don’t know, i feel bored too easily and look for excitement in sports and games.

I am back to bloggin because i just read some pro poker players’ blogs and i’m surprised that so many of them blogs! I guess poker players are more self-evaluating people, so they tend to be people who keep personal notes of themselves? I am definitely this type. Also it is very shocking to find out how many poker players were athletes! I guess that again is another trait i possess, although i was never near professional in standard in any games, i have always loved all sports and play many sports. I probably above average in like most sports.

Anyway i am getting more out of point here.  I just want to say that i will be playing poker from now on, putting in some time each day to play poker, and other times for a new endeavour – investing. I am just starting out, and really clueless and know no people to discuss with? which sucks. at least i got a couple of poker friends. But a true serious discussion partner is very rare, but i think the best thing that you can have in your career. I am learning the basic chart patterns like support resistance those kind of things, i hope i don’t lose momentum, it can get really boring sometimes and i don’t have the best attention span (pretty bad actually). I have my parent’s approval for investing, which is the most i can hope for actually, very comforting actually. First time my self-interest is being supported by both my parents. I think i don’t have anything else to worry about now but to do my best, but that in itself is very difficult, i haven’t been putting in sustained effort in anything for a long time. That’s it, i don’t think this blog post is very structured but i think it should be okay. touched on the things i wanted to discuss at least.

Next blog will be the poker part.

SNGs haven’t been good for me.

86918513	Apr 08 17:04ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go		$1.00 + $0.25	9	2	$2.70
86918499	Apr 08 17:04ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$1.00 + $0.25	9	5	–
86914941	Apr 08 16:31ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go		$1.00 + $0.25	9	6	–
86914930	Apr 08 16:31ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$1.00 + $0.25	9	4	–
86910703	Apr 08 15:53ET	$2 + $0.25 Sit & Go		$2.00 + $0.25	9	6	–
86910736	Apr 08 15:52ET	$2 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$2.00 + $0.25	9	6	–
86905626	Apr 08 15:06ET	$2 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$2.00 + $0.25	9	3	$3.60
86905609	Apr 08 15:04ET	$2 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$2.00 + $0.25	9	5	–
86686372	Apr 06 19:42ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$1.00 + $0.25	9	6	–
86686344	Apr 06 19:42ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$1.00 + $0.25	9	3	$1.80
86680911	Apr 06 18:58ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$1.00 + $0.25	9	4	–
86667703	Apr 06 17:07ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$1.00 + $0.25	9	1	$4.50
86663191	Apr 06 16:29ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$1.00 + $0.25	9	4	–
86661106	Apr 06 16:11ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$1.00 + $0.25	9	8	–
86657452	Apr 06 15:44ET	$1 + $0.25 Sit & Go (Turbo)		$1.00 + $0.25	9	4	–
86392667	Apr 04 13:05ET	Super Sat to the Double Deuce		$0.75 + $0.15	9	6	–

Total Buy-in: $23.65

Total Profit: $12.60

Net Profit: -$11.05

Satellites

I have no idea why i played on the $0.75 Satellite. I thought it was a $0.75 cent SNG. I don’t really like Satellites and FTP tourneys because i don’t understand them yet. I just want a straight forward tournament. A tourney to enter another tourney, and there are so many different tourneys. One thing also is that these tourneys take hours to complete and i don’t think i want to spend so much time on something i can hardly win. I haven’t played much of these big scale tourneys, probably about 5 of these in the micro stakes. Always finish like 40-50%.

SNG

Back to my SNGs i can’t help but say i been sucked out on. I don’t remember ever going into a hand and literally sucking out someone. Unless it’s minor like 57-43. But i lietrally have been sucked out on 80-20 70-30. U know, one live card and he pairs. But without a software like letting me know my “unluckyness” i can’t get it out of my heads why i’m going so badly. Pisses me off the $2.25 SNG i played and was in a good position, like top 3 with 6 left, and i just lost both tables against freakish hands. Why, i could’ve at least gotten $1.35 if i come 3rd on one table, but no, $0. I guess i am bad beat whining again, so easy to say sometimes to “move on” from bad beats but when it happens, it’s just tough on the mind. I guess i gotta keep on playing?

FT SNG vs PS SNG

All these SNGs are played on FT. I think FT is way tougher than Pokerstars. I started on pokerstars and remember i was breakeven or slightly losing. But now that i play on FT, i just can’t win in the cash games, except recently, will elaborate on that later. So i played the SNG on FT and they are easy at first, because i was running really good too. If you read like this post on january 25th, i played 5 SNGs, and finished 1 2 2 3 5. That’s really awesome looking back because now i’m 4 8 4 1 4 3 6 4 6 5 2 (in order) which becomes 1 2 3 4 4 4 4 5 6 6 8. That 4 4 4 4 really hurt me. But is my bubble play really that bad? I definitely know that my mid game is really bad. When it is 6 or 7 handed i don’t know what to do, which hands to play. I often become looser, and try to c-bet or bluff and get into trouble from there. I guess i should stick to what i know – playing tight. I have become way too experimental recently, coupled with bad luck, and that translates into a number of non-cashes. But back to the main point, i think FT SNG are tougher than PS SNGs. The players on FT are better imo, both in cash games and SNG. I mean the top level CGs are played on FT, i doubt there are that many high stakes games in PS. PS is just a lot of games and MTT i guess. Anyway i just think i have a harder time playing on FT. When i play on PS there are quite a number of donkey players, but on FT it is quite rare. I don’t know, i could very well play on a weaker site like CD Poker(?) which i have a $50 free deposit too. Have to keep on playing these games i can’t really beat so i can improve.

2-tabling NL1

The only reason why i am playing cash games at all is because of this promotion called Take 2. It says if you 2 table any ring games for 5 days straight you get a bonus, 10 days straight you get $25 bonus. But since i only have exactly 5 days left in this period i need to play every single day. The first session i played with my friend, Will. I guess we were about breakeven. I was up 70% on one, and down a little on the other. Then all of a sudden i lost with AA on a x x 10 J A board. He held QK, i shud’ve known and shud’ve betted more, but the way it went and hitting top set really blinded me to straight possibility, i need to be more straight aware seriously. I am a bit numbers blind sometimes. Anyway i doubled up on one, and broke on the other one. That’s how it went. The 2nd day, yesterday, i was running like crazy on one, while going broke twice on the other one, what the hell. But i know it’s not my fault. I slowplayed TT on a 4 x T 4 Q board. And shoved river, he showed Queens. Well i could’ve known, but no way i was gona bet to prevent a 2 outer on the river. Then bought in again, raise reraise shove call. My KK vs his QQ. XXXXQ. Gone again another buy-in. So 5x buy-in is nonsense. You can’t survive with that kind of management. 10x is even questionable. But 20x is good i think, safe enough to play without fear of variance. So yesterday i finished with $4.75 on left table. Right table -$3.60 i think. Because i ended up with $1.10 in profit. So thats 1 buy-in profit for 2 hours.

Singapore

Going back to singapore again (unexpectedly) for about 2 weeks. Which is GREAT! I miss playing the home games at friends’ and i get to meet W, my poker partner. I don’t know how much i should play, but i gotta spend my time properly, and download as much as possible. My net is still running there so i gotta make full use of it, planning downloads etc. I also gona play online all-day, and home games as much as possible. I might even go on the cruise again. We’ll see. I’ll try to make full use of this trip to play poker. But i am afraid i would spend too much while i’m there and get my BR crushed. Especially if i go on the cruise and bust $1k like one of my friend did. It’s unbelievable but really likely. If i run so bad online, like 2 buyin gone through no fault, why can’t it happen in real life. Plus i am not rolled enough for it. I took a shot with $600. And came home lucky with $259. But to be honest i need like 10x the buyin if i gona play without nervousness. Which is $3000 at least. I just don’t got that money for Poker. Which means i should be playing only $100  $200 buyin games.

Overall on Poker and Career

Still pretty confused. I want to go all out but yet i question my ability and whether it is the right thing to do. I am afraid i would become a really selfish person in such an individualistic occupation. I play myself, to earn for myself, it’s all self self self. And maybe that’s why i’m attracted to poker… cause i’m attracted to self-gain aka selfish. I want to be more selfless. Like maybe teaching and providing some good product or service for others. It feels good without including ’self’ in it. I been thinking, if i am going to play poker, i am going to keep it as non-self as possible. I want to have poker groups and buddies, like we are a team kinda like in soccer etc. At least you are playing for the team, not just for yourself. Basically be more community minded. Making friends and improving together instead of being stuck in my own situation. If i ever not make it in poker, which i shouldn’t be thinking about if i plan on going all out, but if i think it’s not rationally practical to move on, i will move on to computer programming. I been pretty interested in it for sometime. Gosh i knew i wanted to do computer/media back in college but never made the hard move, not it’s just all back to it. Definitely be more rational and make better decisions when you can. I think me, our family and extended family we are pretty computer minded guys, maybe it runs in the genes. Even playing poker i feel it’s like doing math problems for money, it’s all probability and guessing. I guess people who like math also likes computer programming and likes psychology and likes games and poker and are usually socially awkward! I believe there are different types of people in the world like there are different races and nationalities. Each of us are put here to do something, and together we complement the whole. Whew! I like that statement. I am getting really random right now (maybe due to super bad sleeping habits these last 2 days. Sleep at 11am, wake up at 6pm. Totally oppossite of normal human being).